Java Gabbin'

Here I am, Send Me

2008-05-30T10:50:00.000-07:00

I wrote this a couple years ago. I'll discuss it later but I wanted to get your input first. What do you think? Do you have any thoughts when you read this? You can send it to me privately if you want to remain anonymous by clicking on the Email Me button to the right.

Here I Am, Send Me

You walk each day one step at a time
Minute by minute life goes on
People come and people go
They don’t see you
They don’t know.

Then the world comes crashing down
You dig your hole
You lie in wait
Darkness begs, you plead, you cry
Through your tears you can not hear
The quite voice pleading still
Here I Am, Seek Me.

Quietly you sit and sob
No one cares, no one calls
Do they see me? Do they know?
Will they care? Will they call?
Banging, hurting, crying
Still one small voice is pleading
Here I Am, Seek Me.

Walls surround in cold stark white
People crying, running, moaning
Do they know? Do they care?
Is this the life you're set to live?
Never knowing, needing help
Crying, sobbing, banging, hurting
Digging deeper
Tuning out you can not hear
That quiet voice always saying
Here I Am, Seek Me.

Quietly you sit and listen
Hope is given, work is needed
Do you want to see the light?
Slowly struggling, fighting, working
Tears are shed and wiped away
Hands are held and hugs are given
Standing near the deep, dark hole
Quietly you listen
Still you can not hear
Here I Am, Seek Me.

People come and stay a while
Touching, caring, helping, teaching
Slowly you erase away
Years of pain, confusion, hatred
In its place you start to see
Someone new, never known
Quietly you hear the pleading
Here I Am, Seek Me

People all around you question
Pushing, prodding
Trying to change you
They don’t like the new found you
Growing, seeking, praying, singing
Loudly you proclaim
Here I Am, Send Me.

Singleness

2008-05-25T13:37:00.000-07:00

Good morning, how's your coffee today? Mine is a light Millstone ground Caramel Truffle with a splash of Dolce de Leche creamer. Yummy.

I subscribe to Today's Christian Woman, which is a great magazine if you're interested. This month they have a special section on Singleness. There is one article in there that I seriously want to copy and give to every single person I know.

My single friends will find a great deal from it as the author discusses some of the myths many Christian singles face each day. My married friends will find this useful in dealing with their single friends and maybe know what not to say. I know my married and single friends mean well when they say many of these things to me but sometimes it's not helpful.

Myth #1: Since the Bible says God is our husband (Isaiah 54:5; Jeremiah 3:14), an earthly spouse isn't really necessary.¹

OK, this myth isn't one I really struggle with. I don't have many people telling me this and it's not a huge burden for me. But, to touch on this God designed us to be in relationships. From the beginning of time he created Man and Woman, Adam and Eve because he wanted us to be in relationship to have a helpmate. Genesis 2:20-24

Myth #2: Since, according to the apostle Paul, singleness is a desirable gift (1 Corinthians 7), spiritually mature single Christian women should fully - and joyfully - embrace it.¹

This is something that I hear occassionally from some of my single friends. While it's true that there are some "gifts" to being single. It's also important to read this in it's true context. Yes, Paul was single, but when this was written he was going through a lot. (Not just some simple "life's tough stuff", really true, intense persecution.) In that time he could honestly say "thank goodness it's just me dealing with this. But, also look at the passage...Paul talks about it being good to marry. Again, though, God calls us to be in relationships. Marriage was and is God's design for our lives. So, beings joyful in your singleness isn't a matter of spiritually maturity. It's really a matter of living your life accepting what God has planned for you.

Now, on the opposite side, I do embrace my singleness at this time in my life. For many of my married friends they take this as giving up or saying that God desires for me to live out my life single. I'm not sure what the future holds, I just know that this is where God has me now and I embrace THAT.

Myth #3: Since God promises us the desires of our heart (Psalm 37:4), he'll give a husband to a woman who truly desires one.¹

This is one I get a lot. Yes, God does take care of us. Yes, God does provide things for us. But, God's way is right. He's infinitely wiser than I am (thank goodness) and he knows what is best for me. So, while yes, it is a desire of my heart to have a husband I also accept that God knows what he's doing in not providing one for me (ever or just yet). Can God take that desire away if he wants to? Yes. But, maybe he doesn't want to? Maybe it's his desire that this desire stay on my heart. Maybe he'll fulfill it down the road, or maybe he won't. "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Psalm 3:5-6." The point is to trust the Lord to provide what you need whether that is companionship through a spouse or the comfort of friends when that's not what he provides even though we don't understand WHY.

Looking back over my life and I can clearly see points in the past where I so strongly desired a life-mate. Now, looking back, I can also see that those times when God did not answer my heart's desire it was in my best interest. I wasn't in a place personally, emotionally, and/or spiritually to make a choice for a life partner. God watched out for me there and he took care of it. At the time I couldn't see it but now I can and I thank him for protecting me.

Myth #4: Since the Bible says we're to be content in all circumstances (Hebrews 13:5; 1 Timothy 6:6-8), God won't provide singles with a mate until they're totally satisfied with singleness.¹

Here's another one that drives me crazy. God hasn't NOT provided me a mate because I'm not content with my circumstance. I know that. He's ways are greater (and wiser) than my ways. It's also not "giving up" if I admit that I am satisfied with my singleness.

I haven't given up on finding a husband. I haven't given up on myself as a suitable mate for someone else. I also am not dissatisfied with God for not taking care of this desire of mine. Truth is, I trust the Lord to take care of me. No, it's not always the way I would write that particular chapter in my life but you know what, he hasn't screwed up yet! So, this is one other thing I've long since handed over to him. Am I always happy with how He handles it? Truthfully, no. But, even in those times I still trust that he's doing what's in my best interest and whether he has a mate for me or not it's OK.

You can read the full article written by Lisa Harper here: Singleness and Scripture, this is just my take on it.

¹Harper, Lisa. "Singleness and Scripture". Today's Christian Woman May/June 2008: 43-44

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Neighbors

2008-05-24T10:50:00.000-07:00

Grab your cup of java and sit a spell. What are you drinking? I'm having a nice Millstone Ground light French Vanilla brew with a splash of French Vanilla creamer.

Today's reading is Psalm 86.

The verse that stood out to me today was Psalm 86:7: "In the day of my trouble I will call to you, for you will answer me."

The Psalmist is obviously distressed when he wrote this prayer being attacked by enemies and cries out for God's mercy and deliverance from this threat. I'm not in the midst of being attacked by an enemy. Yet this verse stood out to me. Why?

Lately I've been struggling with my dislike of my upstairs neighbor. I have legitimate reasons to be annoyed with him. But, as a Christian I don't have a legitimate reason to have the reaction I'm having -- the level of disdain I have towards the people living above me is not healthy.

Leviticus 19:18 "Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself..."

Zechariah 8:16-17 "These are the things you are to do: Speak the truth to each other, and render true and sound judgment in your courts; do not plot evil against your neighbor, and do not love to swear falsely. I hate all this," declares the LORD."

Matthew 22:37-39 "Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. 39And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

I've been praying about this (honestly) because I knew that I needed to have a change of heart in order "love my neighbor" and that change of heart can only come from the Lord. As the Psalmist reminded me this morning. "In the day of my trouble I will call to you, for you will answer me."

I've struggled, though, because I kept wanting to pray for patience, but patience wasn't what I needed. Last night on my way to home group I realized what I needed...I needed compassion towards him.

Compassion: "a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering."

By that definition I started to wonder "why compassion?". But, I feel strongly that that is exactly what the Lord told me to pray for towards this person. So, I guess that's what I need. But, now as I ponder it I realize some of the issues I have with this person are things that could be separating him from the Lord. Or, maybe he doesn't have that relationship at all. If that's the case, then I need to be feeling a deep sorrow for him.

So, hopefully in praying for compassion towards him I'll find a love for his being. And through that I'll find a way to tolerate his annoyances.

Lord, give each of us the heart to love our neighbors as ourselves. Give to us the compassion we need to alleviate the suffering of those around us and share the light that comes through you to those who need it. Through you we can find the answer to our troubles. Amen

Reflections...

2008-05-23T17:23:00.000-07:00

When I was doing my devotion this morning I read this quote:

Don’t ever become so busy that you fail to realize how very happy you are!

That statement really made me stop and think. As a business owner I’m busy. Besides owning and running a successful business I volunteer for the middle school ministry at church, I’m an Aunt, I keep a house running, and I try to have a life. There are times when I can barely see straight for all the things I have on my plate. It’s important that even in the midst of all that busyness that I (and you probably too) remember how truly HAPPY I am.

Yes, my work is busy and stressful at times. Yes there are times after “work hours” when my office calls to me and I know I should do a little more work. Yes, I know that sometimes obligations or busyness gets in the way of my having fun. But, still, I’m HAPPY.

I’m happy that God has given me a business that I can support myself with.
I’m happy that God gave me friends that I can share time with.
I’m happy that God gave me a group of middle schoolers that I can minister to,
I’m happy that God gave me a house that keeps me warm, comfortable and provides a place to entertain my friends.
I’m even happy that God gave me my obnoxious upstairs neighbor who shares his love of music and midnight cleanings with me. (OK, I need to keep thinking on that one but maybe if I look at it that way I’ll actually come to not dislike him SO much.)

So, remember don’t ever become so busy that you fail to realize how very happy you are!

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2008-05-22T17:02:00.000-07:00

This policy is valid from 22 May 2008

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